I'm Sorry Who's This?

Hello friends I hope the holiday was most enjoyable for you all... and mine was very eventful too... but this story I 'm about to tell is a doozy...more funny than anything... well let me just get to it.

So it is air apparent... that a lot of people seem to think the sun rises and set's in their ass.  And most men think women would rather suck a dick then eat a piece of cake!  Trust me in this case I would go for the latter.  A guy who I affectionately called Lil Buddy... and the reason he was nick named this is because he was my Fuck Buddy!  Text me few days after thanksgiving with this... and I quote " Hey hope you had a great Thanks Giving... and I hope you didn't think I forgot about you... but wanted say I like you and wanted to be friends on a platonic level"!  

My initial response admittedly was I'm sorry who is this... until I took a second and actually realized who it was... wait what WTF...seriously... ummm when was the last time I talked to you...  see it's a rule of mine to never keep the phone # of the booty call in your phone where you can immediately find it... so that you are not tempted to keep calling but you kind of know it's him.  What gave it away that I liked you?  Um the fact that I never call you before 11pm... I never want to hang out with you...I don't call I only text and when I do it's usually asking you to do me... How does that translate to I like you like that... and do you really think I'm sitting around pining after you... do I appear that desperate...Someone has a high opinion of themselves.

Honestly all I could do is laugh... and instead of being the harsh me...which in hindsight I wish I had been... I said "Good thanks (referring to thanksgiving) and WOW I didn't think there was anything more too it... just enjoyed fucking you no more no less!  So consider us cool... Man get the F outta here!  All you were was a dildo with a body attached... men I need you to play your position...just as you expect us women to please trust you have a position on our team as well... and Lil Buddy your position was filled... you are my "Friend on a platonic level" a day late and a dollar short.

But I commend you for having such high self esteem...but you could really kick rocks with flip flops!