I'm Sorry Who's This?

Hello friends I hope the holiday was most enjoyable for you all... and mine was very eventful too... but this story I 'm about to tell is a doozy...more funny than anything... well let me just get to it.

So it is air apparent... that a lot of people seem to think the sun rises and set's in their ass.  And most men think women would rather suck a dick then eat a piece of cake!  Trust me in this case I would go for the latter.  A guy who I affectionately called Lil Buddy... and the reason he was nick named this is because he was my Fuck Buddy!  Text me few days after thanksgiving with this... and I quote " Hey hope you had a great Thanks Giving... and I hope you didn't think I forgot about you... but wanted say I like you and wanted to be friends on a platonic level"!  

My initial response admittedly was I'm sorry who is this... until I took a second and actually realized who it was... wait what WTF...seriously... ummm when was the last time I talked to you...  see it's a rule of mine to never keep the phone # of the booty call in your phone where you can immediately find it... so that you are not tempted to keep calling but you kind of know it's him.  What gave it away that I liked you?  Um the fact that I never call you before 11pm... I never want to hang out with you...I don't call I only text and when I do it's usually asking you to do me... How does that translate to I like you like that... and do you really think I'm sitting around pining after you... do I appear that desperate...Someone has a high opinion of themselves.

Honestly all I could do is laugh... and instead of being the harsh me...which in hindsight I wish I had been... I said "Good thanks (referring to thanksgiving) and WOW I didn't think there was anything more too it... just enjoyed fucking you no more no less!  So consider us cool... Man get the F outta here!  All you were was a dildo with a body attached... men I need you to play your position...just as you expect us women to please trust you have a position on our team as well... and Lil Buddy your position was filled... you are my "Friend on a platonic level" a day late and a dollar short.

But I commend you for having such high self esteem...but you could really kick rocks with flip flops!

It's Raining Men Hallelujah!

Well since my post... hello mojo.... Hellooooooo MOJO... I mean I'm not sure what's happening but I am going with it.

I think it is sooo true that men can smell other men on you... it's like they are like wait a minute... someone else is trying to piss on my tree... so I'm a piss back...or hey who's piss is this... no it's my tree.

I have had a very interesting week and am looking forward to see what's going to happen next... I almost want to stop this blog...cause if the men read it they are going to know... there is someone else sniffing around... but hey wait... maybe that's a good thing... then they have to step their game up.

Dating is fundamental... it is our duty to date and date often... you know keep our options open... start a bidding war LOL and be honest about it... I mean I am not going to blow up my spot and I definitely won't be disrespectful... but what you don't know won't hurt you and if you ask I will answer... So you have a boyfriend?  No but I date ;) how is that a problem... and men like a challenge right?

Well kiddies stay tuned... some of my stuff might die down for the holidays... but I will be back... and with some dating stories... oh the hazards of having a tell all blog... but the fun of a guy finding out he has some competition priceless! :)

Happy Thanksgiving to Me LOL!

Life's Good... Life's Grand... But Could Be A Bit Better If I Had A Good Man!

Yep I did it... I admit... I want a man... a companion... a bestie... a loved one... someone who knows me better than myself.  Whew that's wasn't as hard as I thought... and I don't even know why I was tripping... why not admit that to myself... I want a better half.

Now I know, two halves don't make a whole...in relationships... but two whole's make a movement.... and that's what I want a movement honey.  I think men think... that I am a spit fire... to much... to strong... but if you actually took time to pull back the layers you would probably see that I am just a girl... a laid back girl...who wants to be loved in that extra special way... that only a Great Man can love... so sorry if I don't settle for just anything... but I wasn't raised that way.  I love to cook...I love sports mainly football... I don't like drama... and I am the life of the party... not cause I'm trying too... just cause I am.

I am learning more and more the perception of me... but the one man who says... hmm there is more to her than what I think... and I want to know... is the one that I am going to marry... see people are always saying... don't put to much out there...don't show all your cards don't do this and don't do that... well...I say.. don't let me get away...I am honest maybe to a fault, but that is one extra thing to love about me.  Cause when I love him... he's gonna know it FULLY!

I was thinking I was going list all the things I want in a man but I realized that may be futile cause it is ever changing... and with all things it is a getting to know process...If I start making demands on the type of guy I want and putting list together... I may miss out on the guy I'm supposed to be with... cause there is only one person that knows exactly what I need and that's GOD.  But I also know the things that I would appreciate in the one that I love with in reason ;)

Now I am not crazy enough to think that a relationship is gonna be perfect... and I am also not crazy enough to think it doesn't take work... for the most part I am old fashioned in that way... If I were to be married... I'm married for life... Not till we get on each others nerves... or you decide your bored... Marriage is a union... an everyday work in progress... and the guy that I need... needs to be on that same page.

Ladies... do you have an idea of the man you want... who's gonna feed you... need you... lead you?  What your deal breakers are?  If not start thinking about it... date around...find out what you do and don't like all men are different.  I know as women get older there list become shorter and shorter and their requirements start to dwindle... I think its a good and bad thing... Good because you are now giving your self a real shot at love... but you might also settle for something less than great for YOU!  Like almost if you didn't settle for that one the next one would have been great!

Okay Okay...enough already... cause not only am I talking to you out there but I'm talking to my self too.  So in closing... to my lady friends if you know of any good men that you are not interested in...in any capacity... hook a sister up... and guy friends too... or if your a guy and reading this... and want to give a shot at pulling back some layers... I promise I won't make it that hard for you... well maybe ;)!

Why a Wing Man/Woman Is Important!

We all know that your friends can help generate and create some pretty fun opportunities... and at some point or another they become the person who helps navigate the cutie over there staring at you... to where you are sitting and then it begins.

At some point the roll of wing man switches depending on the situation... if there is a guy who is feeling your friend and not you...well sometimes you just have to take one for the team and entertain the not so appealing friend...you do this because... you want your girlfriend to be happy... and well you think he's a good possible catch for her too... and this is not his only friend... of course... you keep the not so appealing friend at arms distance because if things work out with the cutie and your friend... you have an opportunity to meet other men.  Then she can turn into your wing man.

It is very important that your wing man not be a hater... meaning... if there is a clear attraction between you and the guy...but she keeps asserting her self to attract attention of the guy... and not taking one for the team a horrible wing man will always want to leave and act like she's tired of talking to these dudes... while you plead to her to stay cause something is clearly happening between the guy you like and you... This is when you realize... she is not a cool wing man and probably won't go out with her in that capacity again.  Wing people just doesn't sound right and is not really a good idea... cause if it's too many women... a guy might feel too intimidated to come up and speak...so in these situations it's always good for it to be you and your homegirl...but if he is so bold...make sure the group of females you are with...really have your back... and boost you up...cause you would do the same for them!

What also makes a good wing person is that they can tell when it's going south...and usually you have a nice que that says get me outta here... your wing person then snaps into action  helping you avert the situation all together.   Saving you from the boredom and ignorance that has just taken place.

The reason other Men make good wing men... is because now a days men are bold and they don't care who your with... but your guy friend can talk you up... or be like this is my sis she's cool as hell... or what ever... the case is... you make a good wing man to your guy friends... cause women are like...who's this dope girl hanging out with this guy and why aren't they dating... well if your like family to him... you know his in's and outs... so who better to say... look he's a good guy...go for it!

I want to thank my wing women... cause it always changes... and thank them for knowing the rules and sometimes taking one for the team... as I do for them on occasion... but oh the fun we have! 

Do you have the right wing man... if not I suggest you re-evaluate...and adjust accordingly!

Easy Tiger!

There are a few things I need to remember in the dating game... But I think first and foremost... I need to remember that people don't think life is as urgent as I do.

I have had a seriously life altering thing happen to me... being diagnosed with cancer at such a young age... changes things it changes you....so much so...that you begin to think...why the hell would I need to be someone else for someone to love me...or why should I change who I am... the answer to that is... I don't have to...and I'm not going to.

I love me... I love the fact that I get a second chance at life and my plan is to live it to the fullest...and if you can't be down with that... then you can't be down with me...now with that being said...I do realize...men are a delicate situation... and because I'm on the "look how much thinking do you need to do?  Life is too damn short mode"... people ( men) are just not there with me.  So I get it I get it... If I like someone... I say so... if I want something I ask for it.   But I realize there is a bit of a game that has to be played, but it's very tuff for me to play... especially now with all this new information... tomorrow is not promised... so I live for the day.  Which (might) answer why I might Kiss or Have sex quick!

I also understand that this may come across as too much for some... and okay I get it... but at the same token get me too...or let's at least meet in the middle... Think of it this way... You like someone... they like you...you are so busy playing games and trying to be cool and you miss your opportunity to be with a really great person... I'm not sure who invented these silly rules...and everyone needing to have their ish together and all that...cause when you go... none if it is going to matter... if you would just let go and have a lil fun and be a bit spontaneous...I also understand that people are very protective of their hearts but what's the use in having a heart if you don't use it... You Love hard you may get hurt... but you will heal and love again... I promise!

I know I got a lil deep today...but it's the truth and you know it... LIVE a little....LOVE a little.....have FUN a little!  Looks like I just talked myself outta slowing down :)

Kissing Bandit

Dubbed the kissing bandit by a close friend of mine... I have to concur it's official... I love to kiss and further more apparently I love to kiss strangers...or they like to kiss me.   It seems my lips are some sort of becon of light and people are drawn to them...

It's like this... ever since I learned to kiss... which was late.. round 13 years old... I can't seem to stop ... I love lips... I love the way they feel... how people are able to use them... how soft they are... and the way they make you feel when they are used correctly.  And thank God up in heaven I haven't caught some un-godly disease or Mono or something... knock on wood.

This past week... I have made out... 3 times... once with someone I know (but was a stranger)... and twice with guys I had just met... I mean I guess my lips are just tantalizing... I mean I like them... they are full and from what I hear the softest lips in the world!  No lie I have been told that... Oh did I mention that one of these kisses was a celebrity... who shall remain nameless, and is not Black... if I told you who it was you wouldn't believe me... so I will just keep that memory too myself.. and well the other people that saw it know.  I am also keen on PDA... and they (the guys) seem to be keen on that too.

I think what really gets my goat... is I do very little to say hey kiss me... I used to think I had some sort of sign on my head that says if you like to kiss... kiss this with an arrow pointing down to my lips...for example...last night was minding my own business went to say good bye to a performer that performed and he started to kiss miss...next thing you know there was tongue...okay now even I was caught off guard by that one... and everyone always has the same reaction... Wow okay Wow...LOL!

Kissing is like a drug... its almost as good as sex... okay I take that back nothing is as good as sex... but it's close... I also know that I don't care how fine you are... or how good you look in a suit... or how charming you are... if you can't kiss we have nothing to talk about... and how is it at this age you don't know how?  So I guess I should be asking my self...if this is the best thing to do...when looking for a more solid relationship... and I say... to hell with it...life is too short... and let's be clear... I don't kiss or let just anyone kiss me... there has to be some sort of attraction/chemistry there before that goes down... but hell it sure is fun!  

So I'm gonna pull out my mask and cape cause the bandit ain't going no where! Hmmm that might even be a cute Holloween costume next year! ;)

Call Me Old Fashioned!

What happened to the days when a man actually called you on the phone to wish you good morning... or even left you a lovely message saying "Hi what are you doing... would you like to go out tonite!"  Then you call them back and talk for 5 hours and don't realize where the time has Gone... and please don't give me the I'm too busy crap... cause we make time for what we want.  Call me old fashioned but I want that back... there was a time when a suitor would come to the house and sit on the porch with the one he liked because there were no phones.

I know we live in the age of technology but there is nothing like the personal touch.  For some reason guys think it easier to text... because they may be "too busy" to talk... well it takes more time to type what you are saying then to place a call and for me to actually hear your voice... when texting, things can easily get lost in translation...and I feel like the voice of the person you like is the sweetest thing imaginable!  Okay, there are times when texting is okay... for example"running late" or "in a meeting and was thinking of you".

I love the sound of a voice when it's being sarcastic... Or telling some corny joke... it means a connection a bond like you are truly listening and understanding... and I the same for you... remember when people used to say.. you sound so sexy on the phone... and listen to your sleepy voice I love it!

Since when are we dating if all we do is text... and I haven't even seen your face since we met... I am smart enough to know you are not that busy.  Fellas, just know that to us it's like your not that interested... we thank you for the attention and taking the time... but really that's worth about a grain of salt.

What I really want to know is when this transition occurred and when did this become an acceptable form of communication for dating someone.  Dating this day and age has become some weird non traditional... hot mess of an activity... So at this moment thank you Greg for actually giving a sister a call... right after we met and leaving a message... and calling me to see if I wanted to go to lunch... Yes I do ;)!

 Kudos to the men who still value the personal touch...